Thursday, February 7, 2013

Love Without Conditions

When you establish conditions on love, you experience the conditions, not the love”

From Everyday Wisdom by Paul Ferrini

Esquimalt 2013

This week at Light Tree we looked deeply and noticed that we had surrounded ourselves by a fortress of things we believed made us safe or comfortable in some way. While this may be helpful in the short term, it does not help us to undo our dependence on external objects to make us feel happy and secure.

We became aware that our relationship to these ‘good things’ such as special food, clothing, people, animals, cars etc. are all ways we think we keep ourselves safe. While we believed that we were embracing life as fully as possible, in reality we were making sure we were doing it from a place of familiarity and safety. This kind of thinking comes from the ‘little me’ or ego self which is limited in perception and feels utterly powerless, despite its efforts to appear tough and in control.

This is why it is important to keep the practice of resting in the peace of our True Nature at the forefront of our endeavour to find real happiness. We cannot pick and choose only the good bits. This only leads to an endless cycle of desire and disappointment. We can only move through life loving and blessing everything that comes into our awareness while forgiving ourselves for believing that the seemingly undesirable has any real power to hurt us.

We are learning to live life without conditions. When start to notice that we only want something for what fleeting happiness it might bring us we can simply sit back and be curious. What seems to be charming me into believing it has special powers, when in fact it has no real ability to bring lasting happiness and peace?

We don’t need to feel guilty when we are fooled, once again, into riding the merry-go-round of desire and disappointment. It’s only another opportunity to heal a confused part of our mind. We don’t have to engage with it, or try to tweak it somehow. We simply notice and let it go with compassion and forgiveness.

This is the power of resting in our creator, however we might perceive them. When we remember that we are part of a cosmic whole that supports and sustains each breath, we do not need to love with a vast range of conditions and preferences.

Its all ok, nothing is missing that needs our ‘little me’ to try and fix or improve it in some way. We can surrender to what feels true in our hearts and let go of the rest. We are unconcerned about outcomes because we know it’s handled by something wiser and greater. What a relief!

We can relax and be at peace, anywhere, anytime. No conditions required.