Three Step Practice

"First, come into the present. Flash on what’s happening with you right now. Be fully aware of your body, its energetic quality. Be aware of your thoughts and emotions. 

Next, feel your heart, literally placing your hand on your chest if you find that helpful. This is a way of accepting yourself just as you are in that moment, a way of saying, 'This is my experience right now, and it’s okay.

Then go into the next moment without any agenda”

Pema Chodron (Living Beautifully with Uncertainty and Change).

Lately we have been discussing how a sense of gratitude emerges spontaneously when we can notice and let go of thoughts that appear to keep us safe. What does it mean to be fully present with ourselves anyway?

If we practice the attitude of kindness that Pema describes above, we reduce the need to feel defensive by making excuses for our thoughts and behaviour. When we treat ourselves as we would like to be treated, we become aware of how often we treat ourselves harshly. This is what Jesus meant when he advised us to “Love thy neighbor as thyself”. We see ourselves and everyone else as Divine beings trying to awaken to love. Gratitude and compassion emerge spontaneously from this awareness.

When we are willing to becoming more aware of how we create our reality we become dilligent about listening to our inner chatter. We can experience moving through discomfort with grace. We realize that its really up to us how much we create our own suffering when our endless judgments and criticisms try to steal the show. Its probably our resistance or attachment to outcomes that really twists the knife.

Life can be challenging enough without listening to the ‘Peanut Gallery’ that drones on endlessly within our mind. Buddha describes the root of all suffering as ignorance. When he says this, he seems to be speaking to our need to pay attention to the chatter of our ‘monkey-mind’ that keeps us ignorant.

Instead we can choose again. Its never too late to stop and pay attention to our own limitless Presence. When do we make this leap? For us its emerged from our sense of being fed up with the story that never ends. We want a new direction that emerges from our own Divine Authority, not the endless list of rules that the world sets out for us, while claiming to keep us safe.

Join us and choose compassion for yourself. Its never too late and we never run out of opportunities to practice.   
Then go into the next moment without any agenda.
(From Pema's book Living Beautifully with Uncertainty and Change)

Stop the madness!

“More than those who hate you, more than all your enemies, an undisciplined mind does greater harm”.

Buddha

From our practices at Light Tree, one thing appears abundantly clear. The ego-mind with all its incessant chatter is completely insane. If we do not practice sitting back and joining with the peace of our True Nature on a regular basis we run the risk of letting ego run the show.

Sometimes it seems that the ego has no purpose but the maintenance of the status quo. It likes things just as they are. Then, suddenly, self doubt takes a new twist and what seems like a good plan becomes riddled with fear and negative thoughts. We are damned if we do, and damned if we don’t. This is the madness of our monkey-mind, or ego.

Buddha knew this, Jesus knew this, and all the great teachers have come to this basic conclusion themselves. We cannot fully appreciate the hold ego-mind has on our thoughts and behaviour until we slow down enough to hear it. If we can sit and just witness, without believing its insane commentary, we can learn to recognize it starting it spiel.

It’s in this precious moment that we begin to join the consciousness of our True Nature. Really? we begin to ask ourselves. This much nonsense cannot possibly be true. When we sit in a witness place, not judging and just watching our essence it’s obvious that only Love exists. The fear that arises is the false self (little me) trying to justify its teeny tiny worldview. Why don’t we just try holding it with love and watch it dissolve? Its just a thought anyway.

It seems we have all had our share of fear thoughts lately. What can we do when we feel hopelessly lost in our thoughts and emotions?

For us, the first step is to realize what is happening and draw on our desire for peace and happiness. We can choose to love ourselves immediately, before guilt and self doubt come to see what’s going on. We can use an affirmation that we have practiced in meditation and choose to forgive ourselves for buying into an illusion that was created by the false self.

For example we might say, “I forgive myself for using this (situation) to attack myself and separate from love”. 

We can also bring to mind the love that we have experienced in our lives and embrace ourselves and the situation in the memory of that experience of pure peace. There is no reason to keep the attack going. We may as well stop, notice, forgive, and then laugh at the ego’s insane attempt to draw us into another of its crazy stories. Why prolong the agony? Let’s stop the madness now.

Step Back

"Nothing exists independent of the Supreme Power. Everything you experience, even the difficult things in life, are your teachers. The one who realizes the Truth blesses everything. How can I be overwhelmed by anything that happens? That is only an idea. You are the untouched One. Do not be afraid."

Mooji

This Spring has provided many opportunities to spend time practicing authenticity. There is no doubt that it takes a firm resolve to stop spinning the story and taking a stand for what our True Self leads us to.

At Light Tree, an essential part of our practice is to stop as soon as we notice ourselves being sucked into our seeming reality. From there we are still and become the observer. We are curious to notice what is happening when the unfolding drama seems real in some way. From there, we stand back, either physically or mentally and wait.

The wait is the most important part. Instead of rushing ahead, fixing, controlling and deciding what’s best, we simply step back. Our intention is “ Teach me, Guide me, Show me.” Sometimes our guidance comes quickly, sometimes a week later, sometimes we never know. Somehow it just feels better.

One thing is for sure, the outcome is always just right when we trust our guidance and don’t try to act on impulse and animal instinct. After a while it becomes easier to let our life unfold through us instead of forcing it through the blender of our fears before we fling it out into the Universe.

Its also important to sit back and laugh at our efforts to control the uncontollable. We can witness our craziness with compassion and be glad that its all unfolding according to a bigger plan. We don’t need to worry at all. What a relief to know we can just be open and ask for help.

Our True Nature is inseparable from the Divine and cannot be changed no matter how much we try to run. We are only trying to escape from ourselves anyway.

Melanie

Join us in Retreat this Summer

“For those who wonder, 'embodiment' means resting our awareness in the quiet inner center, deep within, timeless and whole, anchored vertically through all worlds, all dreams, as the grounded Presence of Pure Love, the Heart of Oneness.”

Jewel

Jewel gives us a living example of what it means to live an authentic life. As her students, clients and friends, we have noticed that being in her presence allows all those that abide with her to have a fresh experience of their Divine nature.

Her humour and deep compassion allow us to feel a deep sense of safety that is essential for healing to take place. In her Presence, we find a rich opportunity to view our ego, along with all its dance of illusions, as an opportunity to grow. From this grounded place, we deepen our understanding of the interconnectedness of all things and are reminded that we can never be separate from our Source. 

Jewel and Stacy are a dynamic example of how to live fully in the present moment by resting in our true nature, which is love. Laugh with us as we watch the ego undo itself from its dominant place in our lives and minds. Come and be inspired and transformed as old identities fall away to reveal our deeper truth. Prepare to be amazed as we drop ever deeper into the peace that dwells within.

Join The Light Tree and our Mighty Companions in retreat this summer.

‘Embodying the Essence of Presence’ with Stacy Sully and Julia Day 

Quantum Forgiveness recognizes the world we see as an illusory projection of opposites and the Truth of Love as our eternal nature.

We learn to trust the voice for Love, the choice for Love, the feeling of Love
and the Knowing of Love through non-dual meditation, deep inner journeying
divine light, non-judgment, quantum forgiveness, the universal Heart, art, sound, expression and happy laughter...

June 29th to July 1st, 2013

For details please find Jewel at www.onenessinoneness.org 

Niceness vs. Authenticity

“When there is nothing about you or anyone else that you are afraid to look at, 

the darkness has no more power over you”.

Paul Ferrini (Everyday Wisdom).

Arwen Barr 2012

How do we address the unease that arises when we feel deep dislike for certain kinds of people? Perhaps we don’t even know them, but we feel anger and hostility coming off them in waves and our usual ways of coping just don’t apply.

Most of us know the discomfort we feel when another person seems aloof, self centered and sometimes mean or vindictive. No matter how friendly we are they remain unaffected. Our niceness just doesn't cut it.

This brings the issue of authenticity clearly into focus. Are we remaining true to ourselves or projecting our own unhealed parts onto the person and acting as if it were true? There is difference. The coldness we experience just might be an aspect of a frozen part of our own psyche.

Deep down we feel cut off from our One-ness with others and ourselves and the feeling of self-betrayal leaves us feeling helpless and angry. Just how did we get off track anyway? One solution is to sit with the unease and notice what it is triggering within us.

As Annie notes: “We welcome back that part … that believes it made a big mistake, is cut off from love, and deserves to be punished.  Our role is to see it, acknowledge it, listen to it, soften towards it, open to joining with it, offer to feel it fully, and embrace it as we would a long-lost best friend.   And in this willingness to surrender resistance, this opening to unconditional love, we invite and patiently await the voice of authenticity to guide our insights and actions.”

Yes, it’s a tall order to admit that our dislikes of others stem from our dislike of aspects of ourselves. We turn the hour-glass over and acknowledge that we must be willing to give up every strategy we think might make us popular, likeable, or socially acceptable and toss niceness out with the rest of the illusions.

It is only by embracing our wholeness that we can feel our True Self beckoning. In sitting with our authenticity we may decide to walk away and be unconcerned about the outcome of the situation. We may feel the need to speak out. Either way, the choice that leaves us feeling authentic is the one that moves away from the turmoil of the ‘shoulds’ and towards a deeper sense of satisfaction and inner peace.

Melanie  

The Path of Deepening Authenticity

 “You come to harmony with others not through conformity, but through authenticity. 

When you have the courage to be yourself, you find the highest truth you are capable of receiving.
That truth is what enables you to reach across the aisle to your brother or sister.

You do not have to agree with others to value them and respect them.
Because you accept your own uniqueness, you can honour the unique path that others take.
Finding the truth in yourself, you recognize it when you see it manifest in others.”

Paul Ferrini (Everyday Wisdom).

The Path of Deepening Authenticity

(Part 2 of 3 of “Why Authenticity?”)

So if being fake brings unease and authenticity brings peace, what fool would keep choosing to fake it?  Apparently most of us most of the time! Whether consciously or unconsciously, we seem to prefer unease or dis-ease, even if we adamantly deny it. Sounds like another layer of self-deception? Certainly confusion.

So much confusion. 

How then do we get real?  How do we distinguish the true from the false, the authentic from the inauthentic?  For me, it is certainly a journey, a deepening process of discernment. 

Surely we all know the excruciating guilt of feeling we have not been true to ourselves. We are often haunted by it. Well, what if all disquiet is at root the pain of self-betrayal? If our truth is oneness, then all attack, all judgement, all rivalry, all resistance, all separation from perceived “other” is an act of self-betrayal because it feels like we are betraying our oneness. And we feel really bad about it even if we don't immediately recognize why we feel bad.

Our first line of defense is typically to blame someone else. If only he or she were different, then I could feel whole again. And then there are those of us whose torment takes the form of scapegoating our own perceived wrong-doing.  Our mind flits around and spots, say, the time I was unkind to so-and-so (substitute the gazillion possible scapegoats and false idols we could adopt). It becomes an “idée-fixe” circling round and round in the mind endlessly. It exhausts us; it reduces us to despair.  The blame, the guilt, the shame seem relentless, and underneath it is the sinking conviction we must be unredeemable.

Even the quest for authenticity, like anything, can be co-opted by ego, and become a tyrant:  “I can't move forward for fear of committing the ultimate sin: being inauthentic!”

What I didn't understand for a long time is that feeling bad is actually, in a funny sort of way, a good thing. Guilt, shame, grief, anxiety are our allies if we understand them to be red flags of our inauthenticity.  What if that is their only significance? What if the pang or stab of guilt is just a scalpel that points out our fakery?  What if the nausea and lightheadedness of anxiety are simply serving notice that we have chosen the separated state of ego-land again?

So we have a great system for discerning between the inauthentic and the authentic.  Unease is the hallmark of faking it.  Peace is the hallmark of authenticity.  Our job is always and only to restore our peace.  Spirit guides with peace.  The absence of peace is the tip-off that we have strayed from the path of authenticity.  What I am learning is that nothing but this is going on.  All the complexity and confusion is simply losing sight of the truth of this.

So what does restoring our peace actually look like?  How do we go about it?

(to be continued)

Annie

10 March 2013

Speaking my Truth, study 1

The Path of Deepening Authenticity

(Part 3 of “Why Authenticity?”)

So, what does restoring our peace and living authentically actually look like?  How do we go about it?

First, I would say, it is helpful to be clear on the one and only equation:  all my disquiet boils down, beneath all the projections onto scapegoats, to the belief that I committed the ultimate sin, betrayed my oneness. I have betrayed love and the only fit punishment is to be cut off from love, terminally ostracized, and soldier on alone. Understandably this feels really bad, so bad that I would do just about anything not to feel it or look at it. This, I am learning, is the equation to be kept clear. Nothing else is going on.

Second, from the platform (or altar) of present moment awareness, that is, a palpable resting in the

Here and Now (the only place we experience oneness, true joining, non-separation, Christ awareness, authentic guidance), I welcome the disquiet that it is so tempting to resist (and its apparent source, be it an unfaithful friend, a cheating partner, an illness, financial scarcity, etc.). This does not mean I welcome misforture; it means I welcome back that part of me that believes it made a big mistake, is cut off from love, and deserves to be punished.  My role is to see it, acknowledge it, listen to it, soften towards it,  open to joining with it, offer to feel it fully, and embrace it as I would a long-lost best friend.   And in this willingness to surrender resistance, this opening to unconditional love, I invite and patiently await the voice of authenticity to guide my insights and actions.  

Now this does not mean “anything goes.”  Authentic action or insight means discerning the false from the true, not assuming that because everything is “Love and Light,” I should accept it all. Afterall the “should-word” is a dead give-away of inauthenticity. As Byron Katie so wisely observes, we can't act from a place beyond our own evolution.  That is the journey.  Not to fake it.  Not to hurry past our lessons, our forgiveness opportunities, our grievances. If we are not authentically ready or inclined to understand or do something at a felt level, that's okay, that's precisely what we are being asked to discern:  what is it that truly offers us the juiciness of authenticity, not the sterility of fakery? What truly lights our fire?  What is our passion?  What is nourishing, not wearying?  What is whole-hearted, not faint-hearted?  What is unforced, not efforted?  What is empowering and resonant with authority?

This path, between disquiet and fakery, on one hand, and authenticity and peace, on the other, is, it seems to me, the cutting edge of our healing and growing awareness and trust.

Annie

14 March 2013

  

.

Why Authenticity?

So why is authenticity significant? What IS authenticity?  And what does practicing authenticity even look like? These are among the questions that we come back to again and again in our Lighttree circle.

For starters, there are clearly some things that authenticity is not.  If there is a “should” anywhere in sight, anywhere in one's decision-making equation, it's a great tip-off that ego, not spirit or inspiration or guidance or true knowing (whatever you want to call it) is in the driver's seat. If you catch any whiff of “I should do something because I owe her, I want to appear to be a good citizen, I'll feel guilty if I don't, etc.,”it's a great opportunity to stop and inquire into what's going on here.

Another great tip-off that inauthenticity is calling the shots is the urge to “people-please,” a variation of that seductive urge to “sweep something under the rug.”  And then there's that big one: the temptation to fake how “enlightened,” aware, loving one is on the “noble”grounds that, well, I should suck back my anger, grief, sadness, and just be loving (as if when we are faking it we can even attune to what love what look like in a particular situation).

And the list grows, I find, as I become more aware of the slyness of ego/fear at masquerading behind the various identities I cling to in order to try and feel more safe.

Another way I can spot inauthenticity or fakeness is that lousy feeling of self-betrayal, whether it expresses as mild unease or a full-blown melt-down, in which I invariably make someone else or something else a scapegoat for my own discontent.  But even if I manage to pretend most of the time and blame something other than myself for my unease, I, like us all, have those moments of clarity when I know it is me who is the problem:  I have not been true or authentic in a particular situation and it is that that is tormenting me.  In A Course in Miracles terms, the reason inauthenticity feels so bad, is that we are “reliving” the excruciating guilt we feel at imagining ourselves as separate from our truth, from our oneness with all that is. Put another way:  if our truth is oneness then, of course, it feels like self-betrayal when we act from what we believe to be a separated place.

And the way we recognize authenticity is the peace it brings.

(to be continued) 

Annie

28 February 2013